Zrun12 the review

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Zrun 12, Day 1. U.K. to Alkmaar, Holland (via Ghent.. )

It was Zrun time again and this one promised to be a hoot, 6 countries, 5 days 3 ferry crossings, 2 breakdowns and a diverse group of Zed heads all united by the common theme, the Zed.

I arrived at the usual meeting place in Dover at 04:45am to much fanfare and applause from the other guys who were already there and waiting.
In no particular order there was:

1. Zogg in his jap spec TT Abflug wide arch
2. The Hollowpoints in their U.K. spec TT
3. Mad Marco and Bo in his Jap spec N/A SWB Slicktop
4. IanL in his Jap spec N/A convertible
5. Buckaroo Banzai in the Jaguar XKR breakdown mule

Following the usual introductions and a petrol fill up it was down to the port to check in for the 06:00am boat.
This was when the Fun started as Mr Hollowpoint was under the illusion that now Europe has opened up you can travel with as little I.D. as a library card or a Bus pass..........Wrong..! thankfully he had packed a passport somewhere and after a bit of searching we were all queing for the boat.

After a bit more chat and the application of some headlight beam deflectors we were all on the boat and heading for the breakfast restaurant. At the restaurant IanL continued his Zrun tradition and said "I'm not going to have the full English, just a piece of toast" Yeah right.....but to his word thats all he eat........Amazing..! It was a feat of personal and emotional restraint that was worthy of a medal..!

Once off the boat I took the lead for the run up through Belgium to Holland and our stop for the first night in Alkmaar. Despite the wet start in Dover the sun was now out and progress was good.

Then as we neared Ghent, Mr Hollowpoint was getting pissed off with an Audi tailgater and put his foot down to get some space. As he pulled away from the Audi a hole in the road sent a shudder through his car followed by a bit of squirming and snaking. We pulled in at a service station to find that the nearside adjustable upper link had sheared at the subframe...

After much discussion with pointing, shouting and inapropriate hand gestures it was time to decide on the corrective action....

Option 1: Phone for breakdown recovery and see what fun that brings?
Option 2: park the car up, jump in with the others and resolve the car on the way back?
Option 3: Continue the rest of the run in the XKR breakdown mule?

The Hollowpoints considered all the options carefully and opted for the breakdown recovery and the supplied hire car, The Shitroen Berlingo..! The French road going interpretation of a Truffle Pig..!
Jumping in with the others was considered not in the spirit of the Zrun and the thought of option 3 was out, Mr Hollowpoint said he would rather have red hot needles shoved into his genitalia than be seen dead driving that thing..!

The rest of the group continued on route and the run up to Alkmaar was an easy run in the Sun.
We arrived About 2:00pm and checked in. IanL now regretting his missed Breakfast made a beeline for the Chinese buffet restaurant in the Hotel dragging Marco along with him.

Zogg and Myself met up with Wozzer and agreed to meet in the bar at 5:00pm
When I came down to reception at 5:00pm to meet up with the others a bus load of Chinese women filled the reception and were doing Kung fu..! fearing for my safety I carried on downstairs to the Bar for a beer...

The Evening was the usual taxi ride into town for a meal at the excellent Cubanita Tapas Bar followed by more beer and chat back at the Hotel.

Day 2 coming soon...

(just as soon as I've forced down this Beef Stifado and another 6 pints of Mythos.. )

 

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Day 2. Alkmaar, Holland to Aarhus, Denmark. (via Hamburg.. )

All the runners were up and checked out by 09:30am (well almost all) ready for the off, first stop was round to the local filling station for petrol and a breakfast of egg and bacon sandwich. The Sun was out so we set of across Holland heading for the Aflsluitdijk (Dyke). The Dyke separates the Waddenzee and North sea from the IJsselmeer inland sea. It’s a good stretch of fast road with surprisingly no speed cameras and good views across the IJsselmeer.

Afsluitdijk, The Netherlands - Google Maps


Bird's eye view of the Afsluitdijk - YouTube

The road from there was a mix of A road and Motorway and the Sun was out with only the odd shower to wash the windscreen.

Later that day at a roadside break MadMarco’s Zed decides to play up with the charge light on the dash lighting up? After a bit of tinkering with no fix the decision was taken to continue in the vain hope it would fix itself... :rolleyes1: As it was daylight and the battery only had to power the ignition circuits we figured we could cover a fair distance on just the battery.
We are a positive thinking bunch us Zrunners...

After another 20kms or so the problem hadn’t resolved itself so Marco decided to make a last minute dash for a service station to take another look. Zogg and Wozzer who were taking the lead missed the radio cue for the services and got separated from the Group. I also missed the radio cue and just spied the back of Marcos car entering the slip lane for the services and just made it across the traffic to follow him.

Following a good look at the car we concluded that the Alternator had given up...

It was now Marcos turn to look at the options and make a decision :

Option 1: ring for breakdown recovery and see what fun that brings?
Option 2: leave the Car for the recovery and Jump in one of the other cars?
Option 3: continue the rest of the run in the V8 Growler breakdown mule?

Marco didn’t fancy option 1 as he didn’t relish the thought of being left waiting for hours in the motorway services.
Option 2 was again ruled out as not being the done thing so that left option 3?

Marco was filled with dread at the thought of the embarrassment and ridicule he would receive from option 3 and quickly came up with an option 4..!
He decided he would risk driving the car to Hamburg to the hotel planned for the Sunday night and book in for the night, then try and get the car resolved from there. Brave Man..

So I set my Sat Nav for the Hamburg Hotel and Marco Followed with Ianl bringing up the rear. By this time Wozzer and Zogg had continued on route for Aarhus, Denmark and were held up somewhere on route in Monsoon rain and Traffic.

So with Butt cheeks clenched we set off for Hamburg which was about another 60kms according to the Sat nav. As we neared Hamburg we had to enter a long tunnel and Marco was more than a bit worried at the thought of breaking down in there. However we made it to the hotel without breakdown and parked up. The Hotel was full but they kindly booked him and Bo in at the hotel next door.

By the time we had said our goodbyes it was 6:00pm and IanL and myself still had a fair distance to go to make the hotel in Aarhus and meet up with Wozzer and Zogg.
The good news was the motorway was only about half a mile away and it was empty heading north for Denmark so it was foot down and apart from a quick petrol stop we pressed on and made the hotel by 9:00pm.

After parking in the underground car park IanL and I checked into our corridors, Yeah that’s right corridors not rooms..! My room looked liked a converted broom cupboard and as the room was so small there was no room for a bed..!...... the bed was a shelf on the wall ..!
Wozzer had obviously sucked off the guy behind the reception desk as he was sharing a room with Zogg and it was huge.

After a quick bite at Burger King we had a few beers in the hotel reception and then bought some bottles and retired to Wozzers Dancehall sized room. This was when Zogg posted his location up on Arsebook, this was quickly spotted by and old flame that he knew from years back.
She was now living in Allborg which was just up the road on the next day’s route.

After and exchange of posts on Arsebook Zogg said he had agreed to meet up with her the following day in Allborg………Was that on the Zrun12 Itinerary..?
I think not..!
The rest of the group were not too bothered provided we didn’t miss the boat to Sweden (especially with boat missing being a Zrun tradition).

Roll on Day 3...

 

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Day 3. Aarhus, Denmark to Gothenburg, Sweden (via Allborg... )

All of the disciplined runners were ****, Shaved and Showered and down for breakfast at the previously agreed time...
Not mentioning any names but Wozzer made an appearance later on, full of excuses about the hair dryer not working and no hot water and blaming Zogg for not waking him up etc etc. Then he started moaning about everything that was available for breakfast including the Danish pastries, “there not proper Danish pastries” he said even though we were in Denmark..? Perhaps they have them shipped in from China...Who knows..?

Eventually we were all checked out and on the road, after a quick fill up for petrol we made the dash to Allborg for the rendezvous with Zoggs Lady Friend. She had given him directions to a restaurant on the outskirts of town next to a shopping mall, this took a bit of looking for but we found it o.k. and parked up in the car park. Zoggs Lady Friend showed up a few minutes later with her daughter and after the introductions we went in to the shopping mall as Wozzer was determined to find some proper Danish pastry...

We found a coffee shop selling large family sized pastries in a foil tray and so the purchase was made along with coffee's all round, we found a table so that Zogg could re-acquaint himself with his Lady Friend while IanL and myself amused ourselves watching Wozzer make a complete fool of himself trying to keep the attention of the Daughter (fair play, she was a bit of a looker).

Zogg very soon realised he was in trouble here as after 5 minutes of reminiscing with his Lady friend her flames had been well and truly re-lit and were burning like a furnace...! This refreshed love was to consume Zogg for the rest of the run (and probably to this day) with a continuous stream of minute by minute text messages requesting attention...

After a lot of eye fluttering from Zogg's lady friend it was time for someone to take charge of this hopeless situation as we were nearing the boat missing time, being a stickler for punctuality I stepped in and said, right TIME OUT..! CHOP CHOP..! Time to make tracks Guys...
So the gooey love scene was disbanded :cry: and we made our way back to the cars and set off for the Gothenburg Ferry. Whilst the Girls were very nice company we had to remember that this was the Zrun, not a speed dating meet...

The drive up to Frederikshavn to catch the ferry was less than an hours run and the sun was out, the road was empty and the cars were all behaving so on the drive up Wozzer consumed his family size pastry...

The Ferry trip takes about 3.5 hours and is a very relaxed affair, it was more of a booze cruise/casino for the locals all hitting the bar and gambling on the hundreds of high payout slot machines that filled every spare corner of the decks. Wozzer had a flutter but didn’t win anything.
The family size pastry hadn’t made a dent in his appetite either as he sat down to a full meal with Zogg and IanL

Frederikshavn, Denmark to Gothenburg, Sweden - Google Maps

There was a party of boozers sat at tables on the outside deck at the back of the boat with one guy playing a guitar and all of them singing with a lone drunk nutter staggering about doing juggling tricks with an empty wine bottle, the sad act was looking for an audience but there were no takers...

When the ferry docked in Gothenburg the route to the hotel was through the town, Zogg and I took the wrong turning through the town and left IanL heading for the hotel. The Cheese was off the Cracker and we had to hit a few side streets to get back on track.

Down the side streets there were people everywhere outside bars sitting out on the pavements and in the roads boozing.
They certainly know how to party in Gothenburg; Batman must be kept busy trying to clean up these streets.

The Gothia Towers Hotel was the complete opposite of the Hotel in Aarhus, Big, Luxurious and Modern. Several bars and restaurants and not as expensive as we imagined it was going to be. A large beer was about £5.50 which was very reasonable based on the standard of the hotel. There is also a theme park right next to the hotel which looked worth a visit.

Gothia Towers Hotel

Gothia Towers ? Gothia Towers

Liseberg theme park

Liseberg Amusement Park - Gothenburg, Sweden

After Parking the cars in the garage and checking in we met up in the outdoor bar for the last sunshine of the day. Then Wozzer showed up looking like he was turning into the incredible hulk..!

But it just turned out to be some daft contact lenses. After a few beers we moved to the bar/restaurant inside for more beer and the evening meal which was superb. The quality and service was first class.

There was a grand piano and singer in the bar playing all evening and as the evening drew on the place filled with the typical Swedish leggy blondes, this kept Zogg mesmerised all evening only being interrupted by the text messages every 5 minutes from his New flame...

Later that night back in his room, Zogg swears he saw Batman through the window climbing the side of the building looking for Gothenburg villains.........or was it just his new flame Stalking him…??

Day 4 coming soon...

 

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Day 4 Gothenburg, Sweden to Hamburg, Germany (via a monsoon… )

Day 4 started bright first thing and as usual we met in the breakfast room at the agreed time with the exception of Wozzer, he was obviously still running on U.K. time…

The breakfast room was huge like a school canteen and the food selection was also huge. IanL and myself had a good fill while waiting for Wozzer to surface, he did arrive eventually making excuses that Zogg had been up at the window half the night trying to spot Robin…

We checked out and got the cars out of the garage. As we were driving out of Gothenburg we had a chance encounter with Zogg’s Hero, what was the chances of that and Zogg was over the moon...
Batman was obviously on his way home after a nightshift of crime fighting.

BATMAN CHILLING IN HIS LAMBO - YouTube

I hope the Bat cave wasn’t far because just after our lucky sighting the rain started and did it rain..! for a couple of hours drive it was really heavy rain, you couldn’t even see where you were going let alone see each others cars, we had to use the radios to check that the cheese was still on the cracker.

Once the roads did dry up we had a bit of a race with a Merc, he sat on our tail and at one point we were doing 120mph and he was still behind us. We let him past to see how fast he was prepared to go and he took it up to about 125mph, Buckaroo Banzai then blew him away in the V8 growler breakdown mule at 150mph…. the Merc left at the next exit with his tail between his legs….

This day’s drive took us down through Sweden back into Denmark and on to Germany over 2 of the longest bridges in Europe.
Firstly the Oresundsbron bridge between Malmo in Sweden and Copenhagen in Denmark.
The bridge spans the Oresund Straights and is half bridge, half tunnel.

Øresund Bridge - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

And then the Storebaeltsbroen bridge between Korsor and Nyborg in Denmark, this bridge spans the Great belt

Great Belt Fixed Link - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The run into Hamburg was very easy with the Park Inn Radisson hotel less than a 1km off the motorway. This was to be the last hotel stop for this run and the hotel didn’t disappoint.

Park Inn Hamburg Nord - 4 Star Hotels Hamburg - Hamburg Airport Hotel

Although the Gothia Towers in Sweden was very exclusive, of all the hotels on this trip the Park Inn had the best rooms (with air con), the best car park, the best bar and the best breakfast, and it was not only the cheapest, it was cheap at around £50 a night including breakfast. Just shows that price is not always a measure of quality.

While checking in we asked if the bar and restaurant were open (with it being a Sunday)
Yes and yes and the weekend special was…….Tapa’s..! That pleased Wozzer no end...

So after a relax in the rooms we met up in the bar for Beer and Tapa’s, the barman was very friendly and speaking good English, he kept us quiet by putting the Grand prix on the plasma and keeping us topped up with good German Beer...

After the Tapa’s we held the Zrun12 raffle which was part of the Zrun12 “help the heroes” charity fundraiser, big thanks to all those that donated money to the fund and prizes for the raffle. The fund raise reached the target of £250………

Zrun 2012 Swedish run

We all had a good chance of winning something since sadly we were now down to only 4 runners out of the original 8. There was a good selection of prizes and we all bought equal tickets each to keep it fair.
IanL cleaned up, winning most of the prizes on the table...

Much to the disappointment of Zogg who only came away with a bottle of Lamborghini aftershave…..

Then it was time for the Zrun12 challenge, “Beat Buckaroo at his own game”..! The runners had been waiting patiently all weekend for this challenge, as this was the high point of the Zrun12
The rules of the game were simple; an idiot called Buckaroo had to play the other idiots at his own game and try to beat them….

The atmosphere in the room was like a high stakes poker game, the barman was running a book taking bets off the locals in the bar but despite the strategy and cheating employed by Buckaroo, he lost to all of them….
Which only goes to show that it doesn’t matter how big an idiot you are, there will always be bigger idiots..!

Day 5, the final chapter coming soon....

 

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Day 2 updated with a helicopter view of the Afsluitdjik..

 

[Buckaroo Banzai]

Day 5. Hamburg, Germany to the U.K. and home (Via Alkmaar… )

During the best breakfast we had all weekend we discussed the day’s route and decided to make our way back into Holland and run down some of the coast back to Dunkirk.

Despite a slightly late start Wozzer was ever confident that we could cover a 10 hour drive in 5 hours if we put our foot down a bit…. The weather was spanking sunshine today and warm so at a petrol stop, IanL decided to drop the roof on the vert and make the most of it...

We drove right across Germany and back into Holland over the Aflsluitdijk again heading for the coast near Amsterdam. the views from the Dyke are amazing...

It was now Lunchtime and Zogg suggested he would like to try some traditional Dutch Fast Food….
So we detoured into Alkmaar town centre and parked up in the multi storey and walked to a Dutch café selling allsorts with chips. We ordered ……..uhhh..? I don’t know what it was but we couldn’t eat it all, some sort of big meatball with onion and chips.

After lunch we got back on the road and IanL still had his roof down enjoying the sun but as we got into the afternoon the sky went black and the rain started. He drove through a few showers claiming on the radio that is wasn’t too bad all the time he kept up a good speed. Eventually he had to give in and pull over to put the roof, not sure if it was the rain or me deliberately spraying my windscreen washers soaking him with screen wash when he was behind me…

Just after that my sat nav threw a wobbly and directed me off away from the others and into a town centre. The Cheese was off the Cracker….

By the time I had got back on track the others were way ahead, I didn’t catch up until reaching the port at Dunkirk by which time we had missed the check in for the 8:00pm boat, no surprises there but at least the cheese was back on the cracker…

The ferry crossing back was spent in the lounge and was a time for, reflecting on the highlights of the run, **** taking, many more texts from Zogg’s lady friend, and more **** taking....

So the Zrun12 was nearing the end for another year but what a run it had been, sun and rain, good driving, bad driving, breakdowns, good hotels (and a not so good one), good food, good beer, good company and great cars…….What more could you ask for..!

This review may not make complete sense to some of you, and the only way to ever fully understand it………. is to be part of it..! I hope I can be part of it again next year and you should too……

Zrun13…Coming to a forum near you, soon..! (Details to be announced)